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Flowers for Pachyderm, by Mark Strand
As Franz Kafka awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself
transformed into a raging bull elephant. He charged around his room with
his trunk sticking straight up making loud trumpeting noises. The picture
of the lady in furs came crashing down, the vase of anemones tipped over.
Suddenly afraid that his family might discover him, Franz stuck his
enormous head out of the window overlooking the courtyard. But it was
too late. His parents and sisters had already been awakened by the racket,
and rushed into his room.
All of them gasped simultaneously as they stared
at the great bulk of Franz's rump. Then Franz pulled his head and
turned toward them, looking sheepish. Finally, after an awkward couple
of minutes in which no one spoke, Franz's mother went over and rested her
cheek against his trunk and said, Are you ill, dear? Franz let loose
a bloodcurdling blast, and his mother slipped to the floor. Franz's
father was about to help her up but noticed the anemones tipped over
on the table. He picked them up and threw them out the window,
saying With Franz like this, who needs anemones?